From Business Psychology Associates*
While we do not keep track, nationally, of the reasons for divorce, there is evidence that job-related stress is a growing concern. Recent studies have indicated that as many as 25 percent of divorcing couples site work and job stress as a factor in their conflict. Managing work stress and sustaining a strong marriage are not only possible; both are quite simple. The object is to make the principles of both a habit and a discipline.
Many couples mistake the "worn-out" feeling they have when they get home as a condition of their relationship. That feeling may in fact be nothing more than an empty tank after a long day at work. Tanks get empty when people are not clear and fair about roles and expectations.
If your role is one of always solving problems, being the breadwinner as well as being the one everyone can count on to work overtime, you may be burning your candle at both ends and leaving little to nothing for your partner or spouse.
You may want to speak with an EAP (employee assistance program) counselor to re-evaluate your roles and expectations. You might also want to follow some of the following tips to ensure a long and rewarding marriage:
Seeing your spouse and family as a source of stress can be an unconscious process. Stress is a response to the demands placed on us. Experts suggest that we learn to set limits or establish boundaries on the demands we expect ourselves to meet. The demands of work as well as the demands of a home and family are not likely to ever go away. What we do with them from one day to the next holds the solution.
Many people are learning to "delegate" stress. Turning work stress off with a prayer or affirmation as they leave the office. The idea is to learn to leave "work at work" much the same way we leave the concerns of "home at home" when we go to work.
Your family and your marriage should be your respite. Go home tonight and agree to try some of the suggestions above. Your most special partner in life is worth it as are you.
Your EAP is a safe, free and confidential source for help if you need it.
(For more information, visit the Business Psychology Associates, BPA, Web site at: http://www.bpahealth.com/ )
*BPA is the Employee Assistance Program provider for State of Idaho employees.